At work

To resolve conflict, communicate with each other on a one-to-one equal basis and avoid behaviour that will break down communication.

At work an environment for healthy conflict  can be encouraged by setting clear expectations.

Create an organizational culture or environment in which differences of opinion are encouraged. Make differences the expectation and healthy debate about issues and ideas the norm. Placing emphasis on the common goals people share within your organization can help. People have a tendency to focus on the differences experienced with another rather than focusing on the beliefs and goals they have in common with each other. If organizational arrows are aligned and all are moving in the same direction, healthy conflict about how to get there is respected. If you are a manager or team leader, do this by asking others to express their opinion before you speak your own. Tell people that you want them to speak up when they disagree or have an opinion that is different from others in the group.

Reward, recognize, and thank people who are willing to take a stand and support their position.

You can publicly thank people who are willing to disagree with the direction of a group. Your recognition system, bonus system, pay and benefits package, and performance management process should all reward the employees who practice personal organizational courage. These employees speak up to disagree or propose a different approach even in the face of pressure from the group to agree. They lobby passionately for their cause or belief, yet, when all the debating is over, they support the decisions made by the team just as passionately.

If you experience little dissention in your group, examine your own actions.

If you believe you want different opinions expressed and want to avoid group thinking, you experience little disagreement from staff, examine your own actions. Do you, non-verbally or verbally, send the message that it is really not okay to disagree? Do you put employees in a “hot seat” when they express an opinion? Do they get “in trouble” if they are wrong or a predicted solution fails to work? Look inside yourself personally, and even seek feedback from a trusted advisor or staff member, if the behaviour of your team tells you that you are inadvertently sending the wrong message.

Expect people to support their opinions and recommendations with data and facts.

Divergent opinions are encouraged, but the opinions are arrived at through the study of data and facts. Staff members are encouraged to collect data that will illuminate the process or problem.

Create a group norm that conflict around ideas and direction is expected and that personal attacks are not tolerated.

Any group that comes together regularly to lead an organization or department, solve a problem, or to improve or create a process would benefit from group norms. These are the relationship guidelines or rules group members agree to follow. They often include the expectation that all members will speak honestly, that all opinions are equal, and that each person will participate. These guidelines also set up the expectation that personal attacks are not tolerated whereas healthy debate about ideas and options is encouraged.

Provide employees with training in healthy conflict and problem solving skills.

Sometimes people fail to stand up for their beliefs because they don’t know how to do so comfortably. Your staff will benefit from interpersonal communication, problem solving, conflict resolution, and particularly, non-defensive communication. Goal setting, meeting management, and leadership will also help employees exercise their freedom of speech.

Look for signs that a conflict about a solution or direction is getting out of hand.

Exercise your best observation skills and notice whether tension is becoming unhealthy. Listen for criticism of fellow staff members, an increase in the number and severity of “digs” or putdowns, and negative comments about the solution or process. Are secret meetings increasing? If you observe the tension and conflict is endangering your workplace harmony, hold a conflict resolution meeting with the combatants immediately. Yes, you do need to mediate. It’s okay to have positive conflict but not to allow negative conflict to destroy your work environment.

Ensure that people are committed to the same goals and direction. They will look for the best approach, the best idea, and the best solution, not just the one that will benefit their own area of interest. This will also ensure that the people in their organizations spend their time problem solving and solution seeking rather than finger pointing, blaming, and looking to see who is guilty when a problem occurs or a commitment is missed.

You need to sit down with the people who report to you directly and with their direct reports and ask them why. Some positive, problem-solving discussion might allow your group to identify and rectify any problem that stands in the way of open, healthy, positive, constructive conflict and debate. The future success of your organization depends upon your staff’s willingness to participate in healthy conflict, so this discussion is worth your time 

Basic steps must be followed when talking through a problem in order to avoid creating hard feelings and misunderstandings. We have all observed the futile results of people attempting to talk through a problem, only to discover that greater complications were the fruit of their labours.

definitely avoid bringing up the problem when your colleague is walking out the door. A better approach would be; ‘we need to talk about this, when do you have time to work this out?’

Accept the right of the other person to suggest a satisfactory solution.

Always be sincere with your words. Empower all parties in a conflict. If people are at odds with each other, they should all be part of the resolution process. It may be difficult to give each a say, but that’s what’s necessary for everyone to take ownership of the problem and its solution.

Consider a mediator if the problem gets out of control, or if the issue is too emotional to resolve in a mutual discussion.

At this step, your supervisor should be involved